Hard

As I write this, I am currently the only member of the Richman family not in attendance at my brother-in-law's funeral.

It hurts to be thousands of miles away from somewhere you want to be, so far from people you want to love and support. What they are going through is beyond comprehension. And though I know nothing I do or say can take the pain away, I at least wish I could be there to put my arm around them.

Because I don't know what to do or where to direct my emotions right now, I'll just post the lyrics to the song my sweet husband is probably currently choking out at the pulpit and hope that my loved ones can feel love and peace amidst the tragedy of it all:

little boy in a base ball hat
stands in the field
with his ball and bat

player of them all
puts his bat on his shoulder
and tosses up his ball

and the ball goes up and the ball comes down
swings his bat all the way around
the world so still you can hear the sound
the baseball falls to the ground

now the little boy doesn't say a word
picks up his ball he is undeterred
says i am the greatest there has ever been
and he grits his teeth
and he tries it again

and the ball goes up and the ball comes down
swings his bat all the way around
the world so still you can hear the sound
and the baseball falls to the ground

he makes no excuses
he shows no fear
he just closes his eyes and listens to the cheers

little boy he adjusts his hat
picks up his ball
stares at his bat

says i am the greatest the game is on the line
and he gives his all one last time

and the ball goes up the moon so bright
swings his bat with all his might
the world's is still still it can be
and the baseball falls
and that's strike three

now it's supper time and his mama calls
little boy starts home
with his bat and ball

says i am the greatest that is a fact
but even i didn't know
i could pitch like that

says i am the greatest that is understood
but even i didn't know
i could pitch that good





We miss you already, Tyler.

A Quarter Year

Our little lady had her four month check-up earlier this week. At her two month appointment she was in the 50th percentile for weight. Just as I suspected, our little chubster has now jumped up to the 75th. As both our doctors have said, "Chubby babies are happy babies"--totally true with both my kids.


I already think she's going to be shy. Sometimes when I look at her and smile she'll smile really big and then turn away like she's embarrassed. It's cute.

The same thing rarely makes her laugh twice, so we're always looking for something new to get the giggles out of her.




She is still my little buddy. She just loves me and I adore it. I always thought any little girl we had would be a daddy's girl. Maybe it'll still happen some day but for now, she's a mom's girl, but probably only because Brian's not home enough to see her these days. Sad.

She's a sympathy crier. If she hears someone else crying , she'll usually start up, too.

She likes to suck on her fingers, which is kinda weird to me since Jamers never did it.




We can already tell she's probably going to be a drama queen. She'll be smiling and laughing one minute and throwing a fit the next. Heaven help us.

She is a talker and I love watching her cute little lips take shape when she makes certain sounds.

She is a gorgeous baby. Her eyes are still blue. Please oh please let them stay this way. Her hair is not quite as dark as it was when she was born.



About every other night or so is a good one. There, so far, seems to be no rhyme or reason to what makes for her long stretches. Since I know she's capable of at least nine, it makes me so frustrated when she only does four or five.

She and James take turns torturing me in the sleep department. If she sleeps like an angel one night, James will be awake instead. If James has a rare morning where he sleeps past 7:30 (this used to be a regular occurrence until he got a new bed) then she is up at the crack of dawn. One morning she slept until 8 and James woke us up at 5:45. I think they are conspiring against me to make sure I get as little sleep as possible so I won't ever want any more kids.

James still loves her to pieces but is getting used to her enough that he also is already starting to get annoyed with her sometimes. Like if she is sitting next to him and accidentally kicks him (cuz, you know, babies kick) he'll say "Stop it, Liv! Mom she's kicking me!"

I love this girl. And that's all I have to say.

Book Review

I've reviewed a couple books for Bethany House Publishers. Here's the latest review (I probably won't be recommending this one for any book clubs) that I also posted on Amazon . . . 

Relentless Pursuit by Ken Gire

I wanted to like this book. The title/subject was intriguing to me. Yet I've been sitting in front of my computer for the last 20 minutes struggling to find something positive to say about it. And I suppose that's just what this book was for me, a struggle: a struggle to get through, a struggle in nearly every page to keep to the point, a struggle in the very art of writing, etc.

This was the first book I've read by the author, Ken Gire. Unfortunately, after this book it will probably be my last. Overall, it wasn't well-written. If I hadn't known Gire had authored nearly two dozen other books, it would have been obvious it was written by someone who had never written before but wanted to give it a go anyway. It seemed disjointed, didn't hold my interest, and at times seemed to go off on a tangent about other subjects entirely.

It wasn't until the fifth chapter that Gire even discussed "who is the outsider?" Then in chapter eight he seems to say if you are the slightest bit wealthy or successful (or anything other than destitute), than you are an "insider" and lose touch with the "outsider." The truth is that anyone, anyone at all, can feel like/be an outsider. Socioeconomic class alone cannot dictate it and in that sense Gire's premise falls apart.

Ironically, the book finally began to shine in chapter 9, the book's concluding chapter. Gire's description and thoughts on the movie "Never Let Me Go" (although perhaps unrelated to the "outsiders" theme) and subsequent conversations with his sister and friend finally gave me a real glimpse into his thoughts, was somewhat well constructed and thought out, and gave me substance I could relate to.

I'll end with where I began: I wanted to like this book but despite the author's good intentions, the struggle to get through it was too much to overcome.

This book was provided as a review copy by Bethany House Publishers.

Half a Decade

We made it to five years! Go us!

Dang, we looked good young back then. It's amazing what five years, not enough sleep, and a lot more stress does to you. Oh and kids. But that's another story. 

Happy anniversary to my husband of five years. I can't wait to see where the next five years takes us (seriously, I really want to know where we'll be living, so lets figure it out asap).

Livy Livster

Here's a cute little video of Livy talking to us at dinner last week. I sure adore this girl. Last night she slept nine hours straight and oh how I loved her for it. She has been sleeping dreadfully horrible lately and I was on the very edge of having a breakdown because of it. Thank you, Livy, for finally having a good night.

She is sure growing fast. She's huge. HUGE. She's talking up a storm these days and smiling and laughing a ton. She's my little buddy, too. She gets upset if I set her down and walk away or if she can't see me. She definitely still resembles her big brother, but she's also becoming her own little person.

She's to the point where I wish she'd just stay small longer but I'm getting glimpses of her personality and I also can't wait to see who she becomes.  It's crazy to think that when we leave Tennessee in two years she'll be about the age James is now. I'm already predicting toddler girl drama.