It went something like this:
"For someone who claims they miss their old friends horribly and is always complaining about how hard it is to make new friends, you sure are anti-social."
Which then led to this:
"With all that time spent NOT going out and doing things, you sure aren't accomplishing much at home."
And it's true. I've been invited to quite a few outings over the last few weeks and for one reason or another (some reasons totally valid, some not), I made absolutely zero effort to go to any of them.
What's my problem, anyway?
I can only conclude that I've just been lazy and super anti-social, which is not a good recipe for making and keeping friends, or for having a good life and accomplishing goals, for that matter.
It seems I've got a million things on my mind these days and another million things on my to-do list. I want to be social, but I also want to sit at home and read the huge stack of books next to my bed. I want to get out and try new things but sometimes I get so tied up in the various ways I can save money that I forget that sometimes it's okay to spend a little money to actually do some living! I want a clean house but even though I've got lots of time to do it, the last thing I usually want to do is clean. I have a list of self-improvement projects and personal goals a mile long but haven't actually set out to accomplish any of them, other than to actually write down that I want to do them (which is somewhat of a start, I guess).
So today I vow to recommit myself to the motto I set myself to earlier this year.
I can do hard things (inspired by a Young Women's lesson earlier this year). It's simple but rings so true to my sometimes half-hearted effort to live and put myself out there.
My main goal this year is to actually write that book I've been talking about for years. Oh, and to be a more patient mother even when my nearly 18-month old son continually wakes up at 2 in the morning and doesn't want to go back to sleep for another several hours.
I can do hard things but that is not one of them I want to do . . . .
I think you need to give yourself more credit and stop beating yourself up!!! I can attest to the fact that toddlers make everything more difficult - that definitely includes socializing! However, I'm always here if you need accompaniment on random excursions ;)
ReplyDeleteWhat is your book going to be about?
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ReplyDeleteYes. Maybe you should go out and make friends. They are people too, you know. :) And you should clean your house. Definitely do that one. Be glad you have a house to keep nice and clean.
ReplyDeleteBrittany, I think my conscience and yours must have had a talk because those are the exact thoughts I've been having too. We miss being in Innsbrook Ward and having so many friends. It definitely takes a lot of effort to make new friends. I'm proud of you for recommitting yourself. I believe in you! And good luck on the book. Can't wait to hear about it!
ReplyDeleteI can totally understand that. I get all sad that I have dont have many friends and I don't get invited to do things often, but then when I do get invited I am lazy or feel like I don't have time to get things done. Sighhh....
ReplyDeleteWe can be friends! :)
from Lorena: When kids ruin your sleep it makes it harder to get yourself around to doing anything - including socializing. You just have to know yourself and what makes you happy and stick to those things, even if it doesn't sound so appealing at the moment. Having good friends is great. Making them, not so much....it can definitely feel like work, but it is worth it!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with JB's sleep problem - doesn't sound fun!
If only we lived by each other. And what book is this that you're going to write? I love you sister! And, coming from a used-to-be-social-butterfly, sometimes it's ok to stay in, too. :)
ReplyDeleteYes, I have been in a bit of a rut lately too, I don't know why. Nice to know I'm not the only one. I have been way into reading books on my iphone and have not gotten a lot accomplished the past few weeks. Oops! As far as house cleaning goes, I have a "system" that I really try to stick to. Its been the same since I had Carter.
ReplyDeleteI'm so intrigued about your book!
Okay, so I know it's been a couple weeks since you posted this post. But I have to say it has come to mind many many times ever since I read it. Your words are exactly my thoughts. It is so difficult to get out there and resettle, meet new people, etc. I desire it, but then being at home is easier and more comfortable. Thank you for posting your thoughts, so that I know I am not the only one! Sure do wish we could hang out together with our little boys. Thinking of you today!
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